my thoughts...

2004-05-05T15:50:00.000-07:00

*sigh! another new dae! tok to pupu n bobo all e way in e mrt about porkchop! how fleshy, fatty, juicy it is! think susu got a little bit annoyed or rather' you suo ling wu' if u understand! i think she noe we like toking about 'N' like that!seriously speaking! i think onli kai understand the above letter!'N' but ... suddenly i understand sth! i seem to be quite gd with her!(toking about past)! and why is she and i deterorate and until lyk susu lyk that? they are lyk onli tok bout fruit basket lyk that and now we re sort of e same lorh! 2dae c her and aizhen working together! feeling quite gd lah! at least she n aizhen gd friends because of their results...but i'll nv be able to be as clever as them lorh!*sigh! ...everything lyk so complicated! feel lyk toking to kai just directly(as she said would lyk ppl to)(c i still can remember!:)so smart!(;), but lyk how do u just walk to her n sae wat... kai do u find us falling apart? or kai we are from... ok gd friends to friends u noe? or lyk... i'm transparent! n guess wat? i think u think so too right? how did i become lyk that? lyk wat kai was last yr! oh i finally noe! last yr i was lyk quite lots of frens! then she felt a bit left out! then she think about everyword or okay some comments from me and then think think think! lyk me lyk that lorh! how do u actually remain e same? lyk some ppl change.. alot! lyk s[melly] lyk very playful! although abit bad to randy, but still ok at least nv do that to me! then quite popular too! ok with everyone! then pupu is lyk ok better with me now but sy also in so sometime they two beta like todae! so i left out lorh! nvm this type of things happen very often!... then susu is lyk still the same as porkchop as ever! and maybe even worse! cause last time with kai very gd then she just irritating! now with/o kai lyk nobody to tok to then she come ask wat moody or not then so...PORKCHOP! hope she nv see this /or else...-_- liao! eating KF now! wait a minute y am i toking like kai? aiyo beta change! still very malu with floren! i mean i feel like she despise me or felt irritated by me like that!(i mean maybe its untrue(or isit?)or wat but got that feeling! maybe i'm feeling a bit inferior anyway she's a councillor... but still... very fierce ok i noe cause class noisy lah but still think she's fierce! i think i better go to IMH or i'll have more pro! how come i'm so... just sth! haven't invent such word yet! maybe... confused and transparent gurl!...

2004-05-04T00:46:00.000-07:00

n, porkchop like a little irritated by me leh! cause i dun wan walk with her home then me,chu,pupu,bobo wait and walk another way! i dun noe lah! talked to my mortal(YQ) on the way to MRT! so fun! but dunno where did she go after reaching mrt! went to platform cannot find anything! hehe just released all my thoughts or partially all of them in the first post! *sigh when can i stop using this type of conveying message and just tok to her?... so stressed! i think i want to settle this b4 exam or i'll be thinking of this for the whole thing! shld i just tell her or shld i just wait for myself to wither b4 she become better with them? how am i going to cut in them when i can't even mix with them? ask question to kai sometime nv hear! then onli can tok to her then so malu! i dun belong there lorh! when can i become cleverer and mix in with those wittys? i'm so dumb! like wat my parents say! where do i really belong?!...................................................................... in bad mood!

2004-05-04T00:18:00.000-07:00

oh yah 2dae... quite angry! y didn't kai ask me to go to e library! ok lah, i noe i veri wat ok but oh... 4got me not really close with flor so... wanna cry already! so lonely! nth to do at home! really ah, they(they noe who i referring to) are getting closer uh! i mean we used to... but now is they... aiyah... not popular anymore!... boohoo... so bad! at least i still have dor, but pupu like also quite ... no i mean sy always think pupu like her STILL! so she can't really do anything! chu is ok but still a bit awkward towards her! not really that close anyway! i mean at least betta then flor! not i saying her but i'm so envy! can tok to kai no matter wat or when.. or where! but for me... i must as well just bang my head against the wall cause no one cares! so why am i still toking like steampot? okay nvm... me n kai just don't hit it anymore! feel hurt is hurt lah! but wat can i do! feel like got such a big sour stone in me that i can't release off! like i want it but it just dun seem to be part of me anymore!... no matter wat i sae it's no use! wat happened to the good old daes?

2004-05-03T01:17:00.000-07:00

yep... todaewas okay! except for the porkchop again!
kai was okay mixed very nice;y with flor they all, not 2
mention i also veri happy with dor lah! but kai say i try
to mix with them so i go then feel like a cat in a bunch
of mice! u noe wat i mean (fb) then i sort of regret not
cherishing our past! when we go to JP together! not as
in ok lah i tell her not to! but this won't happen last yr!
we'll always go together and accompany! even if i or her
ask also will go one! then this yr is orchard, u noe y? ...
isn't it obvious? and it's not my fault she want to sit
with flor right? it's also not my fault for her to tok 2
them instead of me right? it's also not my fault that i
nv go to her there to tok to her cause i dun mix with
them and she will totally ignore me right?
n then other ppl like aizhen, flor and melly tok she
sososo excited! me go leh? will ask huh? again? wat
u mean?... or wait! i noe she very busy lah! i noe i
like 'wu li qu nao' lah but that's how i feel lorh!
then like last yr we can understand each other one lorh!
it's not as if i need to tell her or call her to ask me about
my feelings one lorh! then we got special words or
signals and wat do we get this yr? huh? dun understand!
i mean wat can u do bout anything if wat ur hard
achievements become like that? i dun noe! i realli
very luan! shd i just give up? i really dun want to lorh
such a good relationship! how can it become like that?
i 'bu gan xin' ah! i dun care! i tried to dun think bout
it then i really feel very hurt! very pain! ok if u think
i'm exasperating, i'm so disappointed!...
-from a hurt gurl...

2004-04-30T03:16:00.000-07:00

. hi! todae quite moody... stupid porkchop so ...
and some more dare to be irritated with me
when i'm telling e truth! so hurt! ppl moody
still make me more moody!'>_was quite ok! kl left me alone again! boo!
nvm just want to comment on porporkei!
(short-chicken) so unreasonable! ppl say
anything also none of her business lorh! ppl
timid cannot! so i'm scared will die one
mah ppl feel like saying jiu say lorh! must
get her permission one meh?then talk to
teacher in cute voices...who would blink that
hard on teacher and smile so sweetly? ok i
dun critisize her! but how can she call susu
fat gurl? ok she is fat)(OOPS!)( but she dun
need to say until she dun mind ppl calling her
that lorh! n she is e one feeling wat moody
and then release evrything on susu very fair
orh? then bk at home can fly home n take meh?
y so desperate for that book? n i think it's time
she admit that she is acting cute! i mean it's
not a bad thing but some time can be rather
irritating one lorh! just normal very cute mah!
but act cute then ugly liao! so my advice is,
dun act cute then u will be CUTE!:)